Ariel wrote the parenting advice column, Ask Ariel for Portland Family Magazine from 2015 until the magazine folded in 2017. In addition to parent coaching, Ariel writes about family travel and family adventures for various print and online publications.
One way to be with a difficult or challenging experience or mind state is to focus attention on something visual. Using an object that changes over time can help settle a difficult emotion or experience. A glitter jar is a great tool to help kids and adults calm down and it’s a fun family project.
Read MoreMy husband likes to roughhouse with our 3-year-old daughter and 5-year-old son. Their play is often quite physical and I hear lots of “No Daddy, don’t tickle me,” and “Daddy, stop. I don’t like that.” But in the midst of play, my husband continues to tickle and wrestle with our kids to the point the kids often come crying to me. I
Read MoreWe have some neighborhood kids who play in ways I don’t particularly like: they sometimes bully younger kids; they pretend to smoke; they egg each other on to do unsafe things like jump off tree branches. I want to tell them that their behavior is inappropriate, but I also think it’s none of my business. How can I approach this in a way that will make the kids think twice, but not offend their parents?
Read MoreMy son was so excited to start fourth grade, but it’s only a few weeks in and he is miserable! He does not get along with his teacher at all, and comes home furious and frustrated. What can I do?
Read MoreMy child always tries to keep up with his older brother and cousins. He plays with them, acts like them and seems to think he is older than he is. The problem is that when he is unable to do something that the bigger kids can, like read a book on his own, he gets very upset. When he is upset he calls himself horrible names and berates himself. I don’t know how to get him to stop calling himself a stupid idiot.
Read MoreMy 7-year-old wets himself at school. He never has an accident at home — if he were home-schooled, we wouldn’t even know he has a problem. He has at least two accidents a week, and doesn’t seem to care. Right now, I dress him in padded incontinence underwear because I worry about bullying, but he shows no signs of stopping.
Read MoreMy 8-year-old son loves sports. He is an enthusiastic soccer player and would wear his team jersey every day if he had the option. Now he is at an age when all the leagues have become very competitive and he will have to try out to make a team. He has various physical disabilities that will likely mean he will never make it past the tryouts. My question is, do I let my son try out and likely fail, or do I shield him from the disappointment that this next level of soccer will bring?
Read MoreMy son attends kindergarten at a wonderful public school whose boundaries have been targeted to change by the school district. Should we just “pull off the band aid” and change schools now so our children can have the same peer group throughout their public school careers? Should we talk to our son about these changes when it is still undecided?
Read MoreMy 5-year old son hates getting ready for preschool. He goofs around all morning, playing with Legos and quietly refusing to get dressed, eat breakfast or walk over to his wonderful preschool program. According to his teachers, once I manage to get him to school, he does very well and seems to enjoy himself. Do you have any suggestions of how to make the mornings less of a fight?
Read MoreMy 6-year-old son responds to all conflicts physically. Whenever he is upset, he slugs his older brother on the arm. If he doesn’t feel well, he slugs his older brother on the arm. I don’t like it when he immediately hits when he gets angry or impatient. I don’t know how to help him.
Read MoreMy son is such a picky eater. He won’t eat meat or most vegetables. He pretty much dislikes anything that isn’t bread or pasta. How can I get him to try new things?
Read MoreI want to get your advice on the right time to tell my daughter that my boyfriend is not her real dad.
Read MoreI work full time from home. This means I am able to pick up my kids from the school bus stop every day. Unfortunately, I invariably get a call or text asking me to pick up one of the neighborhood kids and watch them “just for a few minutes” when their parents are late.
Read MoreMy daughter is 8 and we are starting to have play dates now where the parents do not always attend. I’m very hesitant to allow her to visit someone else’s home unless they are a relative or close family friends. Am I being overprotective?
Read MoreMy 8-year-old daughter doesn’t love school. She doesn’t hate it exactly — she enjoys seeing her friends and making art. Sadly, however, her school doesn’t have an art teacher; only music is offered. But she shows little or no interest in any subject that is more academic. How do I get her to be more engaged in school?
Read MoreAll my 9-year-old wants to do is play video games. Gone are the days of family board games, group art projects or storybook time cuddled together on the couch. I’m not sure how to spend time with him anymore.
Read MoreMy 8-year-old daughter lied to me for two days. If she is lying to me as an 8-year-old, what will she be capable of as a teenager?
Now that I am working full-time, I feel really disconnected from her new school. I haven’t even met her teacher in person yet. Do you have any suggestions on how to be more involved with my daughter’s school?
I want to say I love my kids. They are funny, smart and most of the time I absolutely adore them. But I am so happy they are going back to school. It’s been a long summer with too much family time and I am ready for a break. The problem is that I feel guilty for wanting them to be in school all day.
Read MoreMy thirteen-year-old son is very upset about the results of the presidential election. He skipped school to protest, he was suspended for writing an expletive and the president-elect’s name on his forehead. He says things like, “how can half of our country think he is a good person when he says such awful things.” We have talked at length about politics and activism but he doesn’t believe that he can be an agent of change at his young age. Any advice?
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